How can I help my teenage son if he has to change schools?

A change of school is always complicated, but at some ages, such as adolescence, it is even more so. If your teen is dealing with this change, these tips can help. Also you can take help from

Main problems that may arise

Adolescence is a complicated stage, full of physical, mental and emotional changes in which friends are essential. For this reason, changing the boy or girl from high school to a new one where she will not know anyone and will have to integrate from scratch, can be very complicated.

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This change can be the trigger for existing problems

Obviously, the more shy , introverted and shameful the adolescent is, the more difficult it will be to make new friends, so personality and way of being are key to the success or otherwise of this change.

Among the main problems that can arise after a change of school we find:

  • Reluctance or refusal to attend classes.
  • Poor school performance and low grades.
  • Trouble making new friends, isolation, or even bullying for being “the new guy.”
  • Problems at home, arguments and confrontations with parents, whom he blames for his new problems.
  • Depression, anxiety and even suicide attempts.

In most cases, the problems are minor and resolve themselves as soon as the boy manages to make new friends. However, in some cases this change can be the trigger for existing problems or create very complicated situations that the adolescent does not know how to deal with. This can pose a serious risk to his mental and even physical health.

For this reason, we must be very attentive to any change in the boy or sign that indicates that something is not going well. For example, irritability or aggression, trouble sleeping, locking himself in his room, apathy, sadness, self-harm or eating disorders, to help you as soon as possible.

How to help the adolescent with this change?

The first thing you should do is explain the reason for this change. Thus, he will not see it as a punishment, an imposition from you or a way to embitter his life. It may be something obvious like moving to another city, but it may also be related to problems at the previous school. That is why it should be clear to him that this change is for his own good.

In addition, you should always speak positively to him and show yourself happy with this change so that he understands the good part of this whole process.

Once he starts at the new centre, help him make friends, signing him up for activities in which he can interact with other classmates, letting him meet his classmates outside the centre or inviting some to your home so that he can forge a friendship.

Talk to his teachers to find out how he adapts to the centre and to know what problems may arise in it, since adolescents are often reluctant to talk to their parents about their problems. This way you will know not only how he is doing academically, but also how he relates to others or if there are bullying problems.

Be aware of possible signs of anxiety and depression and, in case of any worrying signs, try to talk to him to find out what is wrong and if it is necessary to seek help from a psychological professional.

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Do not underestimate the problems that he tells you, even if they seem insignificant, since they can hide something more serious or simply make him lose his confidence in you. You should always listen to him carefully and give him your support and understanding so that he can be sure that he can count on you.

If he has academic problems, due to the fact that his level is lower than that of the new centre, you can look for a support teacher, in addition to asking his teachers how you can help him from home to catch up with the others.

The most important thing to help him get through this change is to always support him, be aware of his possible problems and show him your love so that he doesn’t feel alone.